Beautiful Day

I had a hard time getting out of bed today, but I am so glad I did. What an amazing day it was – the perfect day for a walk, The Greater Austin Walk Now for Autism. The last time I did the walk, it was 2008 and it was so cold! This year, the weather was perfect, in the 70s, not a cloud in the sky, a big beautiful Texas sky. Looking around me, I saw many other people like me, parents of children with autism, at various places on the spectrum. I felt bad that Tyler wasn’t there, but it would have been incredibly over-stimulating for him – the people, the sites, the sounds. The boys had been sick earlier this week and we had tickets for Curious George Live later in the day, so Geoff and I decided to keep them at home.

I am proud to say that we exceeded our Team Tyler goal. As I turned in my donations, I thought about the good they would bring, as the search for answers continues. I am so glad I was not alone, Sammie, my mother-in-law (with more emphasis on mother), accompanied me. We had such a great time and saw some old and new friends along the way. We also saw Darth Vader, his storm troopers and Geoffrey from Toys R’ Us. Tyler was terrified of these characters last time. I was excited to take a picture with Darth Vader; I LOVED Star Wars growing up. One day, I am sure Tyler will too.

Loriana Hernandez, anchor of Fox 7 News was the emcee, as she is year after year. Her niece Maggie has autism and as she told her story, my eyes filled with tears. I was so overwhelmed by emotion and the feeling that I am not alone in this. Another lady shared her story, and once again, tears streamed down my face. I have always been an empathetic person, but I feel even more so now. And this cause is so near and dear to my heart, yet still a little new. I could not hold back the tears and they flowed down my face like a waterfall. But they were not tears of sorrow; they were tears of joy at being in a large group of people who had the same life experience as me. It’s important to find comfort in others, especially ones who share a similar experience -- autism. Darth Vader and his storm troopers probably thought I was a nutcase, but you know what, who cares? These were tears I could no longer hold back, and they freed up something in me. They also made me think of my journey and the hope I have for Tyler.

Another lady talked about how hard autism is on the family as a whole, on the siblings, grandparents, aunts and uncles. I remember after Tyler was diagnosed, what an emotional train wreck I was! I also remember how hard it was on my sisters and Tyler’s grandparents. I have never talked about this with anyone. They wanted to help out so much, but they did not know what to say or what to do. But having my family and close friends helped me get through it, even if they felt helpless; with their love and support, they really helped lift me up and out of despair. This certainly has made me a stronger person and I do feel that there is nothing I cannot conquer.

I have high hopes that next year I will exceed my goal and donations from this year. At first I was discouraged and felt that I would not reach my goal, but slowly and surely, things looked up. I need to make time to do this every year. Giving back is extremely important and something that we should all do, especially a cause that you feel so passionately about. Autism has certainly been that for me, a life changing and challenging experience, but I wouldn’t have it any other way.